Hello lovelies,
I'm writing this a few days after my first Spineforce treatment, and boy I am wrecked! But lets take it back to the day and discuss my first session.
As I told you in my last post, I was really excited leading up to my first session. I was (and still am) putting a lot of faith in it working and having some sort of relief.
I don't want to publicly give the name of the technican of the sessions, so let's just call her "E". E was also the technican last time I did Spineforce and I really love her. She also suffers chronic illness so we are connected on that level of understanding. She knows pushing yourself when you suffer chronic fatigue is more of a hinderance then help to your health.
So at the start of the session we chatted a little about my health and how my foot and back were. E mentioned that my foot injury would impact the treatments and make it a little harder for me. For those who don't know, December 2014, halfway through my Spineforce treatment, I broke/shattered my right foot. It will never be the same again and now has Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) in it. E asked me to stretch my foot every day to help loosen up my foot and calf muscles. I have been stretching a few times a day since Thursday and it has helped the flexibility a lot already.
If you want to know the basics of how the machine works during a session, check out the video below. It will help understand what I'm talking about with my progress on the machine in the future.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Og1kB6YR_h4&index=75&list=WL
We started off with a round of the machine without the base moving. I quickly remembered the push and pull techniques for the handle bar thingys and realised how sore I was going to be! We added in the base movements which made reaching the targets a lot harder. The aim whilst on the machine is to reach the target number (or you can use the bullseye but I prefer using the numbers). For this session my target was a 3, we started off on the Discovery mode also- so really really easy paced.
Despite it being a very easy session, I felt it a lot in my right leg and foot, as E expected. She said my leg was "like concrete" and I absolutely need to stretch before each treatment. The rest of the day my leg and foot ached quite a lot. We ended with planning out the 16 sessions, Medicare approving 2 sessions a week. I was expecting to be doing 3 sessions a week for 3-4 weeks, but I'll be doing 2 sessions a week for 8 or so weeks. It probably work out better in the end only doing 2 sessions a week because it'll give me more time to recover in the long run.
I'll update you after a few more sessions on how I am going, I won't be writing blog posts after every session.
I hope you are all well.
Gentle hugs,
Bridget
Monday, 19 June 2017
Wednesday, 14 June 2017
What the heck is Spineforce?
Hello
lovelies,
If you know
me personally, you know that I have some major problems with my back that
causes severe pain. It’s become so debilitating that I can no longer stand, sit
or lay without feeling as if there is a knife in my lower back, lots of
sciatica pain and a very numb right leg. A resolution to this problem would be to
have a spinal fusion, but the idea is still very daunting to me and I’m not
ready for it.
In 2014 I
began doing Spineforce (I promise I’ll explain what Spineforce is in a moment) but mid way through
the treatment I ended up breaking my foot. So treatment stopped and I focused
on healing my foot. Now, a few months after applying to do it, I start
tomorrow. And I am SO excited.
Spineforce (also is referred to as Huber) is a machine that is one of its kind. It’s a neuromuscular trainer that helps
strengthen the muscles attached to your spine/vertebrae to strengthen your deep core. It's the only machine in the world that can do this. It can assist in spinal rehabilitation and PREVENT further injuries. Having already completed half the treatment in 2014, I did already feel my back being stronger and more stable. The benefits of Spineforce include: improved balance, enhanced co-ordination, better flexibility and enhanced muscle strength. My doctor also believes it could help my Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome in my right foot that happened after I broke it.
I think of it as a somewhat intensive treatment because in order to make sure it effectively works, you are required to do 3 sessions a week for 3-4 weeks. For me, that's a lot of work. I live 20 minutes away from my Doctors Office (where the treatments happen), so I need to get myself ready to go, do the treatments then wait around for my doctor to check I am ok after the treatment. Luckily I have someone to do the driving for me, which I don't think I could've handled doing myself. I do remember last time, in 2014, I did flare, and did have some added back pain at first, so I am prepared for that this time around. It will definitely take my everything to get to the treatments, but I am determined to do it.
The treatments initially are very very short. I was told that as soon as I felt any sort of pain we were to stop, as that meant we were pushing too hard. Some treatments can last only five minutes. The treatments themselves are very basic. You stand on the machine, holding onto the weird handles and complete little exercises; pushing and pulling the handles with varying degrees of pressure. It might seem like you are achieving nothing, but you are retraining your brain as well as working your muscles, and these things shouldn't be rushed.
There aren't very many of these machines in Australia, I just happened to be lucky and have free access to this thanks to my amazing SuperClinic and Medicare. I think part of the reason that there aren't many available is due to the price of the actual machine, it is a very expensive piece of equipment. I do hope more are available for those with spinal problems in Australia soon.
I am going to give Spineforce my absolute ALL. I need this to work. I need some sort of relief for my back and I don't want to have to resort to a spinal fusion yet. The neurosurgeon I consulted with about my back told me he recommended I put off spinal surgery as long as possible because of my age (I was 27 at the time of the consult) and he believed I'd need more fusions in the future due to the pressure spinal fusions place on discs above and below the fused disc.
I plan to document this journey, not only for myself, but for you reading this. There really isn't much online about Spineforce from a patient's view, in fact when I first did it in 2014, I was very skeptical because I couldn't find anything on the internet about it! I want people to be able to come to the blog and get an honest opinion, so I will be blogging about this journey, as well as posting over on my Beautifully Broken, Chronically Strong Facebook page (link below).
So, here I go, hoping and praying for some relief. To not have to reach for the pain medication or the Zen spray, but to be able to complete simple tasks such as washing up or cooking without the need to sit on my walker.
If you have any questions about Spineforce and the treatments you are welcome to comment below or contact me privately.
Gentle hugs,
Bridget
Monday, 29 May 2017
How did you get sick?
Hello my loves,
I have been posting a lot in the Bridget's Birthday Wish Facebook Event to raise awareness of chronic illnesses and to share my story. Originally the event was a way of me celebrating my 30th birthday in a meaningful way, but I soon learned it was an opportunity for so much more. It's inspired me to share more of myself and my daily struggles. I realised I'd hidden myself away on social media and wasn't sharing my life anymore in fear of people labelling me as "negative" and looking for pity. The event has re-ignited my passion for spreading awareness of how debilitating these chronic, invisible illnesses are, helping those who are newly sick to navigate their new world and helping families and friends learn how to best support their sick loved one.
A few days ago Kathryn asked:
"You said that 10, even 5 years ago, you would not have expected your life to be like this. Would you mind sharing a brief timeline, when things started to go wrong, when they got really bad, when you realised this might not be going away any time soon, and how you felt at all these stages?"
Originally I had written over four pages of my story answering this question. I realised by page four that no one is going to read a blog post that long, and I hadn't even gotten to the part where I was struck down by my illnesses in 2012. I've decided to continue writing my story out in the hopes of maybe one day turning it into a book. But for now let me try and answer Kathryn's question without rambling on.
I think I've always been sick but I've only realised that in the last few years . I truly believe it's in my genes. I never felt like a normal kid, and I certainly wasn't a normal teenager. At the age of 8 my teacher told my Mum concerns as I would always need to lay down after lunch. At the age of 15 I was suffering exhaustion and it was put down to my insulin resistance diagnosis. I barely went to school because simply getting ready for the day wiped me out. I will always remember this one day in particular that I had gotten ready for school and ended up laying on the floor being exhausted and wondering how the heck I could climb the mountain of completing a full day of school. Mum took one look at me and told me to go back to bed. Thats not a normal thing. A fifteen year old shouldn't be THAT tired. Looking back on it now I believe that maybe my fifteen year old self was suffering from a flare of M.E. and maybe my eight year old self was also having a flare.
From the ages of 20-25 I had a pretty decent time. I was still coming home and resting after work like I mentioned, but my newly found confidence from losing weight from my lapband was a natural high I was living off. In 2011 I took myself over to Europe for a 6 week holiday and managed pretty well with the crazy busy schedule. But I can say that as soon as I came back from that trip my entire life changed. I got back from Europe realising there was more to life. I quit my job to focus on my teaching degree and started tutoring children for experience in teaching older kids. I bought a new car, a new laptop and had a new relationship. I still have those first two, but the last one not so much! I rounded out 2011 feeling free and independent.
Then 2012 hit. THE year. The year I will never forget. The year that changed my life and me to the core.
A lot of personal emotional stuff happened during that year. I don't want to dive down that well in this post, but if I go ahead with sharing my full story later I will go back to that year and the hurt and betrayal I experienced. I do strongly believe that the emotional turmoil of 2012 highly contributed to me getting sick. It shattered me and caused a lot of trauma.
Physically it was bad also. My Lapband had slipped, causing me to aspirate onto my lungs. It took months for someone to finally diagnose that I had double cystic pneumonia- and it was bad. I spent months recovering at home, with nurses at my house pumping me full of I.V. antibiotics. The first five months of 2012 I spent with pneumonia and it had left me really drained. But it didn't end there. In the July I had my Lapband out. It had almost cost me my life and I was glad to get rid of it. The Lapband really screws up your metabolism so I knew that if I had my Lapband out I'd gain all the weight back. So in the September I had a gastric sleeve done. I'm going to do a seperate post on all of the weight loss surgery drama, but long story short instead of losing loads of weight after the sleeve, I gained. Turns out taking part of your stomach out REALLY wrecks your body.
So by the end of 2012 I'd had emotional trauma, physical trauma and two surgeries. And thats only where the chronic illness journey began. At the end of 2012/beginning of 2013 my body just gave up. I spent two weeks in bed unable to do anything. It was then that my life changed, even though I didn't realise it. I brushed it off for months, stupidly thinking it was just bad sinus (causing the headaches and fatigue) until about March 201. Mum and I will always remember the moment I said: "Mum, does sinus make your body ache?". With that began the journey of tests, diagnosis and finally answers as to why my body had overnight stopped functioning the way to used too. My doctor (he wasn't my doctor until after I was chronically ill) believes that the combination of everything in 2012 contributed to me getting chronically sick- especially as there are studies to link bacterial viruses to M.E. I truly think my body just couldn't handle anything else and my body broke. It was too stressed physically and emotionally and it couldn't handle it all.
I'm not sure if there was a moment I knew that things weren't ever going to be the same again. There was no dramatic moment, middle of the night realisation or crying episode. For me, the first 2-3 years were a haze that I don't remember much of. I accepted my new fate better then most people would've, and now I truly think that being chronically ill was something I knew I was all my life, and when I was finally diagnosed my life made a little more sense.
2017 has been a hard one for me so far. I'm turning 30 in August and I think for the first time since 2012 I've really focused on what I've lost. Maybe it has taken all this time for me to realise this isn't going away, that my life will always be different than I expected it to be. I've learnt this year that its ok to be sad and to recognise that this sucks. IT SUCKS. But the key is to move past that and create a life within the boundaries of my chronic illnesses.
I'm sure Kathryn didn't expect my long winded answer, but without her realising it she gave me the drive to write again. I'm looking forward to sharing myself more. To not let the comments get to me, and to hopefully raise awareness of chronic, invisible illnesses and help those living their lives with them.
Gentle hugs,
Bridget
Want to help me celebrate my 30th birthday? Come and join in the fun! Click the link below:
Bridget's Birthday Wish
I think I've always been sick but I've only realised that in the last few years . I truly believe it's in my genes. I never felt like a normal kid, and I certainly wasn't a normal teenager. At the age of 8 my teacher told my Mum concerns as I would always need to lay down after lunch. At the age of 15 I was suffering exhaustion and it was put down to my insulin resistance diagnosis. I barely went to school because simply getting ready for the day wiped me out. I will always remember this one day in particular that I had gotten ready for school and ended up laying on the floor being exhausted and wondering how the heck I could climb the mountain of completing a full day of school. Mum took one look at me and told me to go back to bed. Thats not a normal thing. A fifteen year old shouldn't be THAT tired. Looking back on it now I believe that maybe my fifteen year old self was suffering from a flare of M.E. and maybe my eight year old self was also having a flare.
From the ages of 20-25 I had a pretty decent time. I was still coming home and resting after work like I mentioned, but my newly found confidence from losing weight from my lapband was a natural high I was living off. In 2011 I took myself over to Europe for a 6 week holiday and managed pretty well with the crazy busy schedule. But I can say that as soon as I came back from that trip my entire life changed. I got back from Europe realising there was more to life. I quit my job to focus on my teaching degree and started tutoring children for experience in teaching older kids. I bought a new car, a new laptop and had a new relationship. I still have those first two, but the last one not so much! I rounded out 2011 feeling free and independent.
Then 2012 hit. THE year. The year I will never forget. The year that changed my life and me to the core.
A lot of personal emotional stuff happened during that year. I don't want to dive down that well in this post, but if I go ahead with sharing my full story later I will go back to that year and the hurt and betrayal I experienced. I do strongly believe that the emotional turmoil of 2012 highly contributed to me getting sick. It shattered me and caused a lot of trauma.
Physically it was bad also. My Lapband had slipped, causing me to aspirate onto my lungs. It took months for someone to finally diagnose that I had double cystic pneumonia- and it was bad. I spent months recovering at home, with nurses at my house pumping me full of I.V. antibiotics. The first five months of 2012 I spent with pneumonia and it had left me really drained. But it didn't end there. In the July I had my Lapband out. It had almost cost me my life and I was glad to get rid of it. The Lapband really screws up your metabolism so I knew that if I had my Lapband out I'd gain all the weight back. So in the September I had a gastric sleeve done. I'm going to do a seperate post on all of the weight loss surgery drama, but long story short instead of losing loads of weight after the sleeve, I gained. Turns out taking part of your stomach out REALLY wrecks your body.
So by the end of 2012 I'd had emotional trauma, physical trauma and two surgeries. And thats only where the chronic illness journey began. At the end of 2012/beginning of 2013 my body just gave up. I spent two weeks in bed unable to do anything. It was then that my life changed, even though I didn't realise it. I brushed it off for months, stupidly thinking it was just bad sinus (causing the headaches and fatigue) until about March 201. Mum and I will always remember the moment I said: "Mum, does sinus make your body ache?". With that began the journey of tests, diagnosis and finally answers as to why my body had overnight stopped functioning the way to used too. My doctor (he wasn't my doctor until after I was chronically ill) believes that the combination of everything in 2012 contributed to me getting chronically sick- especially as there are studies to link bacterial viruses to M.E. I truly think my body just couldn't handle anything else and my body broke. It was too stressed physically and emotionally and it couldn't handle it all.
I'm not sure if there was a moment I knew that things weren't ever going to be the same again. There was no dramatic moment, middle of the night realisation or crying episode. For me, the first 2-3 years were a haze that I don't remember much of. I accepted my new fate better then most people would've, and now I truly think that being chronically ill was something I knew I was all my life, and when I was finally diagnosed my life made a little more sense.
2017 has been a hard one for me so far. I'm turning 30 in August and I think for the first time since 2012 I've really focused on what I've lost. Maybe it has taken all this time for me to realise this isn't going away, that my life will always be different than I expected it to be. I've learnt this year that its ok to be sad and to recognise that this sucks. IT SUCKS. But the key is to move past that and create a life within the boundaries of my chronic illnesses.
I'm sure Kathryn didn't expect my long winded answer, but without her realising it she gave me the drive to write again. I'm looking forward to sharing myself more. To not let the comments get to me, and to hopefully raise awareness of chronic, invisible illnesses and help those living their lives with them.
Gentle hugs,
Bridget
Want to help me celebrate my 30th birthday? Come and join in the fun! Click the link below:
Bridget's Birthday Wish
Wednesday, 24 May 2017
Bridget's Birthday Wish
I definitely didn't expect my life to turn out like this.
So where does my birthday fit into this?
We all like to celebrate birthdays, especially the milestone ones, in a special way. Normally you'd probably throw a party with friends and family. Unfortunately that's not something I can do with my health, and none of my friends live near me. I still wanted to celebrate the day in some way and that's where the idea of having my friends and friends of friends send me birthday cards began. I figured spending my birthday opening cards filled with birthday wishes would take what could be a melancholic day into a day of smiles and love.
Why am I creating my own event? Why isn't someone doing it for me? Well my friends are also sick, and I didn't want them to have to do this for me, even though they offered. I also want to be able to interact with everyone and say thank you to everyone who participates.
So that's my birthday wish.
I want to be able to lay in bed and spend the day opening cards from all over the world. To connect with people- new friends and old. Please help me celebrate my life, my journey, my battle to simply survive each and every pain filled day. Please send me a card and share this event with your family and friends.
You are welcome to send cards early, as I will be keeping them to open on my birthday. If you can add "for your birthday" or something birthday related on the back I can make sure I don't accidentally open it early.
Facebook Event Link
Send to:
Bridget Parker
58 Panorama Avenue
Charmhaven
NSW 2263
Australia
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